I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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