I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
