Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
