you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
