I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
