If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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