you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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