i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
