just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
