im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
