Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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