I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
