: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I just cut my nipple shaving
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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