Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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