my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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