You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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