He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
