So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
