That's intense
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
