fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
