the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
