I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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