All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
