i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
