You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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