Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
did i just pee glitter
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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