And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
