It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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