the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
