Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
