You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
