The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
