The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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