Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
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