i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
