Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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