I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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