you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
