You just made me feel so damn special
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
And then he peed in my hair
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