He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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