My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
