At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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