Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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