I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
