Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
