I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
