what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
