dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
