lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
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