Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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