You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
