And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
